Fully Stoked with my outfit, and patting myself on the back for yet another Little Edie Beale-Saluting look for the day, it hit me.
I did not own or purchase a single garment on my body.
Of course, clothes sharing between friends is an ancient and sacred ritual. When confronted with the limits of one's own wardrobe, it is most sensible to replenish what one has, temporarily, with items from the wardrobe's of the people you love. In celebration of this, and in the interests of figuring out where the bloody buggery hell I GOT ALL THIS SHIT, I've tracked the begged/borrowed/stolen stuff I'm wearing today:
HAT: For legal reasons, I cannot mention how I obtained this hat. Use your imagination.......Oopsie
TEE: I don't know if he knows I have it, but Luke Sales of Romance was Born (a dear, beaaauuutttiiiffffuuulll pal whom I have vowed never to attempt to out-drink again) lent this tee to his cousin whom I was flatting with at the time. I then borrowed it, moved house without returning it, and live in fear that one day will be busted sporting it in his company. Christ it does wonders for my collarbones.....
SPECS: A short term loan from Nikita, who got them at a market in Columbia, a trip she insists was not embarked on for the sole purpose of hoovering cocaine.....I beg to differ.....Even though wearing faux "nerd" glasses is the quickest way to look like a douchebag, these are good coz they look wooden, somehow making it okay....
TROUSERS: Looted from the personal "dress-up" bag of Dion Lee (which is a whole world more faggy than you would think from the way he dresses), which, for a time, served as my day to day dressing resource. There really is nothing not to love about a poorly executed "Versace" print. They make feel Filthy Rich.
BOOTS: On an Easter Weekend bender I ended up in Alexandria at 10.30am missing the sole off one of my shoes. Hobbling to a mates later that evening for a divine Holiday Dinner, her friend Cassie Scott-Finn lent me these little pieces of genius. Lucky, as i needed SOMETHING on my feet at 5am the next morning on yet another nosebag pickup mission in Botany....
Finally, Oh The Horror:
UNDIES: Left by the former tenant of a room I moved into. Shit, I didn't even know the guy. Now that I think about it, it's kinda hot......
In short, Keep the clothe-loans comin'....I'll probably never return them, but I probably look better in them anyway babe.....
XXXX TRANS TASMAN PSYCHO
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